Walking away from anything is hard.
I learned this a few months ago when I had to end a relationship that meant a lot to me for a really long time. And while it was hard, it was really the best choice for me and opened my eyes to how to go about walking away from something that you know is no longer good for you (or never was).
Now, walking away from someone/something does NOT mean that you won’t miss it. It doesn’t mean that you won’t miss the time shared or cherish the memories. You absolutely will.
But even in that, I realized that in walking away and stepping back, I was honoring God because I was listening to His direction and choosing me before someone else.
Since walking away, I have felt better because I am not carrying a load of feelings around every day that weigh me down. I’m not trying to make a friendship work and wasting energy when I know it’s ultimately always going to be the same. I’m not trying to make a too-small shoe, fit.
To be honest, sometimes it doesn’t take all that I’m about to list below to know that you need to leave a situation. Sometimes, it’s immediate and you just have to go. Always follow your gut because that is the Holy Spirit guiding you and protecting you.
So how do you know when to really walk away?
Did you pray about it? I know that seems like an obvious question but it is valid. Sometimes you just need to pour your heart out to God and tell Him how you are feeling about a particular situation. God can offer guidance because He sees and knows all. Maybe He will place on your heart to step away knowing that you will come back together later. Maybe He will tell you that you need to leave the situation immediately, knowing what will come if you stay. No matter what He says, you should always take your concerns to the Lord.
Map Out Reasons
If you are anything like me, you need 10,000 reasons to make a particular decision. I tend to question my gut before I trust it, so one thing I always do mentally is list the reasons I want to step away. Does this person make me feel uncomfortable? Do I feel unloved and unvalued? Are their motives unclear? Do I have to constantly question the love that they give me? Have they been untruthful in the past? By listing out the reasons, I most often come to the conclusion that I was already leaning towards anyway, but sometimes it helps because it allows for you to feel secure in your decision.
Is it Holding You Back?
Let me tell you, this one is HUGE for me. Is the friendship/relationship holding you back? Do you feel like you are not growing because of it? Let me tell you, if you do, LET IT GO. One big regret I have is allowing for relationships to keep me stagnant. Sometimes I feel like I have to “catch up” in life in order to make up for the time. But you don’t have to. WALK AWAY. You can grow and God has BETTER for you. Remember that He is faithful and you don’t have to hold onto something that is not only not serving you, but also stunting your growth whether mentally, emotionally, or spiritually.
You’ve Been Feeling It for a While
Like I said before, your gut is really the Holy Spirit trying to protect and guide you. Once you have a “feeling” that sits in your stomach, comes up often, and just about beats you in the head, you know it is time to walk away. Let the gift of the Holy Spirit do its job and lead you in the way that you are supposed to go. Remember God knows all.
Again, walking away from something is never easy. Sometimes, it will really hurt. But you deserve to be whole, walk in the Holy Spirit, and have relationships that honor God and honor you. In the time since walking away, I have learned so much about myself and about God and I pray the same for you. You never know what is on the other side, and I promise you, it’s great.